Posted on August 1, 2020
Posted on August 1, 2020
Every guy imagines himself being able to have sex for hours. Total ejaculatory control. A machine in the sack. Unfortunately, for most, it’s pure fantasy. A delusion. The good news is that you can achieve near-total ejaculatory control. But, it takes practice. Below, we’ve provided a few techniques that you can use to begin controlling your orgasms. Master the simple techniques that follow and you’ll be able to last as long as you want while having sex.
Learning to control your orgasms starts with knowing when you’re going to ejaculate. You need to know your personal “Point Of No Return” (PNR). When you’re having sex, your PNR is the moment at which your orgasm is inevitable. You couldn’t stop it if your life depended on it. Let’s begin with a quick exercise to identify your personal PNR.
Do this exercise when you’re alone. If possible, don’t use any type of material to get excited (such as magazines or movies). If you do, it’ll distract your attention which will make this entire process less effective. During this exercise, it’s critical that you focus completely on every sensation as it courses through your body.
|1.||Your penis should be flaccid. Start stroking your penis to gain an erection. Keep stroking once it becomes hard. Close your eyes and feel every sensation.|
|2.||Your level of excitement will slowly increase. Take note of each level. Assign a number to every excitement level as it moves higher. You’re gradually going to reach your PNR. You want to count each level of excitement on a scale. For example, when you first begin stroking, you may be at a level 1. After a couple of minutes, you may be at level 3.5.|
|3.||Take your time and avoid rushing. Each time your excitement level moves closer to your PNR, maintain that level for 2 minutes. Continue to focus on every sensation you’re feeling.|
|4.||Think about why your level of excitement is increasing. Is it your grip on your penis? Is it the rhythm of your stroking? Are you thinking about something that’s particularly exciting to you? You must have full awareness of your excitement levels.|
Important Note: Go slowly. If you rush through this exercise, you’ll end up passing your PNR and ejaculating without gaining the control you want.
|5.||Once your level of excitement reaches 9, focus all of your attention to the sensations you’re feeling. You’re close to your PNR. You should feel the semen beginning to build an enormous amount of pressure within your penis. Hold the pressure back and concentrate.|
|6.||Stop. Take a deep breath. Every cell in your body is screaming for release so you can enjoy the orgasm. Don’t do it. Instead, stop and focus on the sensation of being near your PNR. This is the key to identifying your PNR. You need to identify it to control it.|
|7.||The exercise is over. It’s time to reward yourself. Cross over your PNR and enjoy.|
Now, you know exactly where your PNR is. This exercise is the first, critical step in teaching yourself to control your orgasms. Let’s dive right into the techniques.
Breathing control is one of the most potent, yet overlooked techniques for delaying your orgasms. We’re going to show you how to develop this control.
Most people don’t know how to breathe properly. Let’s do a small test to see if you know how.
First, place your hand on your stomach. Breathe deeply. If you notice your stomach expanding, you’re breathing properly. If your chest expands or your shoulders rise, you’re doing something wrong. Practice breathing until you’re doing it correctly. It’ll impact the techniques we’ve described below for you.
When you have an erection and your excitement level reaches 8, breathe deeply and hold the breath. You should feel the urge to ejaculate diminish. Take a few more deep breaths while your level of excitement returns to 5.
Note: Only hold your breath for a few seconds. You can’t learn to control your breathing if you’re passed out on the floor.
When you combine breathing control with the techniques below, you’ll find it much easier to delay your orgasms while having sex.
This technique is exactly as the title sounds. When you’re having sex (or masturbating), be aware of how close you’re coming (no pun intended) to your PNR. Right before you cross the line, stop what you’re doing. Breathe deeply a few times. Avoid anything that might stimulate your penis for 30-60 seconds.
You’ll notice that your level of excitement will decline a few notches. Once it does, you can continue where you left off.
If you’re having sex with a partner, you may be concerned that stopping in the middle will make you look like an idiot (or worse, prevent her from feeling pleasure). You can avoid both scenarios. It just takes a bit of planning and quick thinking on your part.
We’ll give you a couple of examples.
Example #1: Your partner is giving you a blowjob. You love how it feels, but you’re quickly approaching your PNR and you haven’t even had intercourse yet. Here are a few ways to implement the Stop Method…
|1.||Say, “That feels so damn good, but I wanna wait before coming. Give me a few seconds to catch my breath, okay?” Most partners will be only too happy to help you control your orgasm. Especially if it means coming during intercourse.|
|2.||“You’re going to make me explode if you keep doing that! Come here and kiss me.” Spend the next minute kissing your partner. You’ll turn your partner on even more and buy yourself some time to bring your excitement level down. After a minute, you can smoothly guide your partner back to your penis.|
|3.||“It’s my turn! I’m dying to go down on you!” Your partner receives pleasure. You get the time you need. And trust us, you won’t have an argument from your partner.|
Example #2: You and your partner are having intercourse. Your PNR is coming on fast. Orgasm is imminent. You must use the Stop Method or you’ll ejaculate at any moment. Here are a few ideas…
|1.||Say, “Baby, your pussy feels incredible around my cock. But, I wanna hold off my orgasm for a few more minutes!” Then, stop and withdraw your penis. Take 30-60 seconds to catch your breath. You can stop without withdrawing, but if your partner is completely in the moment, she’ll continue moving, pushing you right past your PNR.|
|2.||By the way, if your partner is gasping for air and screaming, “I’m gonna come. I’m gonna COME!” don’t use the Stop Method. Bring her to orgasm and try to time your own to happen simultaneously.|
|3.||If you’ve been having intercourse in the same position, change. It’ll buy you valuable time to bring your excitement level down a few rungs.|
|3.||Withdraw your penis from her pussy. Say, “You have an unbelievably gorgeous pussy. I can’t get enough of it!” Take a few deep breaths and go down on her. This will give you the time you need to maintain ejaculatory control. Plus, your partner will have the time of her life!|
|3.||Withdraw your penis and begin rubbing her clitoris with the head. Up and down, back and forth. Use circular motions, punctuated with a few tender and playful slaps on the clitoris. While smiling playfully, say, “I love the feel of your pussy, baby. But, when it’s naughty, I have to punish it a little.” This can be fun and stimulating while providing you with a short break to delay your orgasm.|
Use your imagination when you apply the Stop Method. There’s no need to just sit there looking like a moron while you breathe deeply. Be creative and playful. Make it fun and pleasurable for your partner. They’ll be happy to help.
Now, we’re going to combine the Controlled Breathing technique and the Stop Method. They’re powerful when used together (which you’re about to see).
Exercise #2: Control Your Breathing And The Stop Method
|1.||Start this exercise while your penis is flaccid. Start stroking it to achieve an erection. Close your eyes (just like in Exercise #1 above) and feel the sensations behind every stroke.|
|2.||While you’re stroking, your level of excitement will rise. Each time the level rises, be aware of the difference. Assign a number to each level. At the beginning, you may be at a level 1. Then, you’ll reach level 2. Soon, level 5 will be just around the corner. Level 10 is your Point Of No Return (PNR).|
|3.||Each time you move from one excitement level to the next, maintain that level for 2 minutes. That will train you to control your excitement and give you time to feel the sensations of each level.|
|4.||Think about the stimuli that’s causing your level of excitement to increase. Is your grip around your penis exciting you? Is it the rhythm of your stroking? Are your thoughts stimulating you? One of the keys to controlling how quickly you progress from one level of excitement to the next is being completely aware of what simulates you.|
Important Note: Take your time. If you rush through and don’t maintain control, you’ll blow right past your PNR and ejaculate. If you do, you might enjoy it for a few seconds, but the exercise will have been wasted.
|5.||Once you reach level 6.5 on your excitement scale, it’s time to apply the Stop Method.|
|6.||Release your grip on your penis and take a long, slow deep breath. Hold it for 3 seconds. Slowly exhale, relaxing as you breathe out. You’ll notice that your level of excitement declines 1 or 2 notches. Focus on what you’re feeling while you’re breathing in, holding your breath and breathing out. Resume where you left off. |
Do the same thing once you reach levels 7.5, 8.5 and 9.5 on your excitement scale.
|7.||Take yourself to the edge each time. It’s like being on the edge of a cliff. Go out as far as possible without falling into the abyss. Finally, release your orgasm and enjoy it. You deserve it.|
The Squeeze It Out technique is simple. Here’s how it works: As you’re approaching your PNR, you simply squeeze your penis in your hand. But, you do so in conjunction with the Controlled Breathing technique and the Stop Method…
|1.||As you’re having sex, you’ll be getting closer and closer to your PNR. Just before crossing over, stop and withdraw your penis. Breathe deeply a few times. While taking deep breathes, use the thumb, index and middle fingers to squeeze just below the head of your penis. Once you notice your level of excitement receding, you can continue having intercourse.|
|2.||You can also choose to squeeze the base of your penis rather than just below the head. Try a flat squeeze (using your thumb and two fingers like wood boards) and a ring squeeze (completely encircling the base of your penis). Use whichever is most effective for bringing your excitement level down.|
Alternatively, you can squeeze the base of your penis without withdrawing. Simply stop having intercourse, take a few deep breathes and squeeze while the need to ejaculate disappears.
Even though sex is mostly a physical act, your mind plays a critical role in maintaining ejaculatory control. Some say that the brain is the body’s most potent sex organ. You may agree after reading this.
The goal of changing your focus involves concentrating on sensations other than those leading up to your eventual orgasm. That doesn’t mean thinking about your favorite baseball team’s stats. You want to be completely immersed in the sex. But, you’re simply guiding your concentration.
1 – Change your focus to a different goal.
Most guys just want to ejaculate. That’s their goal and that’s what they focus on. So, their entire sexual experience is about their orgasm. It’s no wonder most men can’t last more than 3 minutes before ejaculating!
Instead, change your goal. Rather than thinking about the orgasm, focus on your partner. Concentrate on how your partner smells and tastes. Think about how her skin feels on every part of her body. Your mind will be distracted from ejaculating. You’ll be able to enjoy the sexual experience while delaying your orgasm.
2 – Change your focus to a different part of your body.
It’s natural to think of your penis while you’re having sex. That’s where most of the stimulation is happening. That’s where the sensations are most powerful. But, if you focus your attention on your penis, you’re likely to ejaculate sooner.
When your level of excitement rises above 7, move your attention from your penis to other parts of your body. For example, let your mind explore how your legs, stomach and shoulders feel during sex. By shifting your attention away from your penis, you’ll prolong your ejaculatory control.
3 – Change your focus on your partner
Every guy has certain hot buttons that can push him over the edge sexually. For example, some guys can last for awhile until they see their partner’s face as they reach orgasm. Once they see that look on their partner’s face, they lose their ejaculatory control. Other guys are stimulated by the sight of their partner’s breasts moving back and forth with each thrust. It sends them past their PNR.
You need to learn what it is about your partner that pushes you over the edge. Once you identify those things, you can shift your attention onto other elements of your partner. For example, if you’re thrusting from behind your partner and the sight of her hanging breasts makes you ejaculate, don’t look at her breasts. Concentrate on her back or neck. Focus on a portion of your partner that allows you to be submerged in the sexual moment without quickening your orgasm.
Some guys focus on stock prices or sports statistics. That’s a bad idea because it tends to remove your brain from the sexual experience. Your brain is the most potent sexual organ you have. It must participate! Focus on your partner and the things you love about that person. It could be physical, emotional, spiritual, or anything else. Just avoid the areas that cause you to lose control.
We’ve just covered several techniques that you can use to gain control of your orgasms. If you put these techniques into practice, you’ll no longer be limited to the 3 minutes of sex that most guys are. You’ll be able to mentally control your ejaculations and last as long as you desire. You and your partner can experience sexual pleasure that most people can only dream about.